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Air travelling 2K15: Better nude than sorry

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Air travelling 2K15:  Better nude than sorry

A little bit melancholy to the good old days of careless flying. You just went to the airport and checked in and that was it. Now it is a circus with moody security personnel implementing ever tighter security measures and a humiliating undressing procedure. For our own good, of course. This poem was written before the infamous “Christmas Day bombing attempt” on December 25, 2009, when 23-year-old Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab tried to blow up Northwest Airlines Flight 253 from Amsterdam to Detroit with plastic explosives in his underwear. So, what’s next?


The days of easy travelling are done
The pleasure of it has been gone for long
We have to get accustomed to these facts
‘Cause formerly security was lax

At first it was a little strange, but now
I have adapted and know why and how
I come a day before for checking in
And wait in line for hours to get in

I do not dare to take some booze or gel
On longer trips I really smell like hell
No deo, perfume, toothpaste, after-shave
Some people smell like they come from a cave

It first started with shoes, and on it went
When they found Semtex in somebody’s pants
And then they found explosives in a shirt
They changed the rules, at first it seemed absurd

Sure! Now that I am used to the new rules
I wonder how we could have been such fools
We were so innocent, so unaware:
Boarded the plane with covert underwear!

It's only a small price to be secure
At first I felt ashamed and insecure
But now I am so used to semi-nude
And to be safe: that really does feel good!

I sometimes wonder where it’s gonna end
When will they find a G-string that is meant
To blow itself up? We are getting there:
Then they'll be forced to ban the underwear!

Rienk Rienks

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